Samurai Shodown: Fruit Pies!
by Ben Jonas
Summary: A Samurai ShodownSpirits fan-fic that focuses on... pie!


Samurai Shodown/Spirits is a property of (and owned by) SNK (who are now known as SNK Neo Geo, who are a subsidiary of Playmore. Got it? Good!)  
  
Ben Jonas presents:  
  
Samurai Shodown: Fruit Pies!  
By Ben Jonas  
  
Location: Nighttime, in the middle of the forest, somewhere in feudal Japan.  
  
Nakoruru: Ah! It feels good to take a nice, long stroll at night. It sounds so peaceful. This cool breeze is also very refreshing.  
  
Nearby, atop one of the trees:  
  
Gen-An Shiranui *whispering*: Here she comes!  
  
Kibagami Genjuro: Finally! I can't wait to take and shake her down.  
  
Cham-Cham: Me too! I want a piece of her as well!  
  
As Nakoruru slowly walked across the path, she came ever closer to where the trio was hiding.  
  
Nakoruru: It's getting late. I think I'd better head on back.  
  
Genjuro: You're not going anywhere, little lady!  
  
Nakoruru *shocked*: Who said that?!  
  
Genjuro: I did!  
  
Suddenly, Gen-An, Cham-Cham, and Genjuro descended from the trees and surrounded the Ainu girl.  
  
Nakoruru *surprised*: *GASP!* Genjuro! Gen-An! Cham-Cham! What do you three want?!  
  
Gen-An: Isn't it obvious? We want you!  
  
Nakoruru: Hey! Wait a second! *points to Genjuro* I thought you always pursued Haohmaru!  
  
Genjuro: I do, it's just that he doesn't get here until Tuesday, and I need someone to chase after before he shows up.  
  
Cham-Cham: Enough talk! Let's kick her tree-hugging ass!  
  
As Nakoruru's attackers moved in, she took off her scarf, whipped it around Gen-An's neck, and tossed him into a nearby tree.  
  
Genjuro: Hmmm. Not bad, but you're still hopelessly outmatched.  
  
As Nakoruru reached for her weapon...  
  
Nakoruru: OH NO! My Chichiushi! It's gone!  
  
Cham-Cham *with weapon in mouth*: Actually, it's mine now. *runs off with Nakoruru's weapon*  
  
Nakoruru: Hey! Come back here, you lousy cat-burglar! MAMAHAHA!  
  
Out of the night sky appeared Nakoruru's falcon, Mamahaha, and chased after Cham-Cham.  
  
Cham-Cham: GAH! Get this crazy bird away from me!  
  
Genjuro: Better give up while you still can, Nakoruru. You haven't got much of a chance against me without a weapon.  
  
Nakoruru: We'll see about that! ANU MUTSUBE!  
  
Nakoruru charged toward Genjuro at a blinding speed, encircled by a pink aura. Just when she was about to make contact with Genjuro, he grabbed ahold of her arms and slammed her to the ground.  
  
Genjuro *while pinning Nakoruru*: A word of advice: never call out the name of your attack.  
  
Nakoruru: Thanks for the advice!  
  
Nakoruru applied a few rapid kicks to Genjuro's stomach, forcing him to release Nakoruru. As she got back up on her feet, she witnessed a horrible sight before her.  
  
Nakoruru: *GASP!* MAMAHAHA!  
  
As it turned out, Cham-Cham had placed Mamahaha in a headlock, and was repeatedly punching its head.  
  
Cham-Cham *while pummeling Mamahaha*: HA! Not so tough without the ability to fly, now, are you?   
  
As Nakoruru watched in horror as Cham-Cham continued to pound away at Mamahaha's skull, Genjuro came up from behind her, tackled her to the ground, and grabbed ahold of her legs.  
  
Genjuro: Quickly, Gen-An! Grab her arms!  
  
Gen-An: Got 'em!  
  
Nakoruru *struggling to get free*: Let go of me, you cretins!  
  
Genjuro: Oh, we'll let you go, in about a few seconds. Ready, Gen-An?  
  
Gen-An: Ready!  
  
Genjuro and Gen-An began swinging Nakoruru left and right.  
  
Genjuro: One...  
  
Gen-An: Two...  
  
Genjuro and Gen-An: THREE!  
  
Nakoruru was tossed through the air, where she collided into a nearby tree, landed on a rock, and fell unconscious.  
  
Genjuro: Well, that takes care of Nature Girl.  
  
Cham-Cham *holding an unconscious Mamahaha*: And her pet bird, too.  
  
Gen-An: So, what do we do with her now?  
  
Cham-Cham: I know what I want to do with her. *licks lips in a sexually suggestive fashion*  
  
Cham-Cham ran up to the now-unconscious Nakoruru and began sifting through her robe, until...  
  
Cham-Cham: AHA! I finally found what I've been looking for! Funster's Fruit Pies! *holds up 4 packets of Funster's Fruit Pies*  
  
Gen-An: Awesome!  
  
Genjuro: Excellent work, Cham-Cham! At last, our search is at an end!  
  
Cham-Cham *while munching on a Funster's Fruit Pie*: MMMM! Awesome Apple! Bodacious Blueberry!  
  
Gen-An *while munching on a Funster's Fruit Pie*: Incredible Cherry!  
  
Genjuro *while munching on a Funster's Fruit Pie*: Primo Peach, too!  
  
Cham-Cham: AH! That hit the spot!  
  
Genjuro: Come, my fellow comrades. Let us celebrate by singing at a local karaoke bar!  
  
Gen-An and Cham-Cham: RIGHT ON!!  
  
As the trio left to go celebrate their victory at a nearby town, Cham-Cham left Nakoruru's weapon and falcon right beside her.  
  
One hour later...  
  
Rimururu: Sis! Wake up!  
  
Nakoruru *dazed*: Uhhh... what happened?  
  
Rimururu: You were lying unconscious in the middle of the woods. I got worried, so I went to go look for you.  
  
Nakoruru *pats down her robe*: Oh No! My Funster's Fruit Pies have been stolen!  
  
Rimururu *saddened*: *SNIFF!* Does that mean... I won't be able to taste the warm, flaky, fruit-filled goodness of a Funster's Fruit Pie? *SOB!*  
  
Suddenly...  
  
Galford: Have no fear! Galford is here!  
  
Nakoruru *surprised*: It's Galford!  
  
Rimururu *cheering up*: And he's got a big bag full of Funster's Fruit Pies! YAY!  
  
Galford: I heard you lovely ladies were in trouble, so I hurried on over with as many Funster's Fruit Pies as I could find.  
  
Nakoruru *while eating a Funster's Fruit Pie*: MMMMM! Delicious!  
  
Galford: *pulls out a Funster's Fruit Pie* Now available in Creamalicious Custard!  
  
Rimururu: Sweet! *unwraps and starts eating a Creamalicious Custard-flavored Funster's Fruit Pie* MMMM! That's good pie!   
  
Nakoruru: Thank you, Galford!  
  
Galford *mouth full*: Don't thank me, thank fufuuu fuu fuu!  
  
Rimururu: Say what?  
  
Galford *mouth full*: I said, don't thank me, thank fufuu fuu fuu... D'OH!  
  
All Three: HAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
All Three: Funster's Fruit Pies! AW YEAH!!!  
  
Announcer: Funster's Fruit Pies. Available at a grocery store near you.  
  
END!  
  
  
So, what didja think? E-mail me your feedback at insaneben@yahoo.com. See ya! 


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